Thursday, May 7, 2009

Excuses, Excuses

Dear Blog,

I'm not neglecting you on purpose, I'm not! It's just that I'm tired and can't find a spare minute to add to your content. I had a great Grandpa Wednesday post ready to my mind at least...but I didn't leave work until almost 10pm last night and didn't have the energy to write anything.

I know you'll understand when I explain to you what my days entail. All my time is spent running to and fro, helping one customer after another, walking the wide expanse of a 12 acre nursery all day long.

Yesterday I told a very rude customer that I would only help him if he could be nice to me. His attitude improved only partially. Later in the day he came back, wearing a suit and a missionary name tag. Hmmm...

Another customer asked me if I was sure I could do math because she was sure I was charging her too much.

Sometimes when people ask me if I know anything I just say no. Because really Blog, isn't that an ignorant question?

Blog, don't think it's just you. My friend Shane called me two weeks ago and I haven't called him back because I can't find an hour to talk to him. My friend JaLae and I have planned to go to dinner twice and we can't make it work. Some people think I'm rude because I don't comment on their comments...geesh Blog, can you imagine? Who has time to think out 12 paragraph comments? I certainly don't.

And Blog, you should see my house! Laundry piled everywhere, the refrigerator bare, the DVR 99% full...

I don't have time to tell you any more. I have to go and find a tree.

Please be patient with me and I'll try to write again tomorrow.

Tchau Blog...


David G. Woolley said...

What's a DVR? And tell that Brynn person she needs a new computer with a functional back arrow. They're on sale at $1,500.00 for their top of the line arrow.

12 acres of trees? Heaven!

Tell the rude missionary that there are three kinds of missionaries. The ones who save other souls, and the ones who are saved. Which one was he?

If you want to know the third kind of missionary you're going to have to post a comment. Otherwise, I'm going to think up a lot more ugly adjectives that will make etiquettelessness look like a wimpy dangling modified participle.

Which reminds me. Name this movie:

Idaho guy: Where are you from?

City slicker guy: Where I'm from they don't dangle their participles.

Idaho guy: Huh?

Suburban guy: What he means is that you should have asked: Where are you from, Moron?

Brynn said...

Dear David,
My back arrow works on every other site! My computer is just fine.

Dear Noelle,
If I didn't have 12 kids here, I would come help. See you in about 6 months.


Anonymous said...

Dang it! Guess I won't tell you that I am coming up next weekend and I wanted to catch up with you. :(

Unless, you want to go to breakfast. How does 4 a.m. sound?


Sandra said...

David, shouldn't you be attending to a treaty or something?

Brynn, I was having the same problem yesterday, but not today.

Noelle, I love your 12 acres. And I am going to do a post about why.

Amy said...

Noelle, it's funny that you post about being too busy to post when you've only missed 1 day so far this month. I say take a night off, take a nap, watch some of whatever's on your DVR and ENJOY a big bowl of popcorn. That's my vote.

Woolley - Best Two Years! Love that. :) Also, my brother-in-law (the art guy) thinks you're cool.

Noelle said...

Brynn, HAPPY ANNIVERSARY a few days late. One of these years you're actually going to get a card from me.

Cami - Breakfast would actually be GREAT!!! Work doesn't get busy until about 10 or 11. I would LOVE LOVE LOVE it! Call me, text me, whatever!

Dave, here's your comment: BE NICE! Geesh, your mom would tell you the same thing, I'm sure.

Sandra, want the 12 acres? I'm putting it up for sale! ;)

Amy, it's an excellent idea! One I will take you up on in July. Your parents told me last night that they are going to park a car here on Friday night and walk home so that they will have a spot on Saturday. Very funny.

David G. Woolley said...


What do 12 kids and 6 months have to do with each other?


I'll negotiate the sale of the 12 acres. Can you say trading merchnat czar ten times really fast.


I really like your bro in law. What's his name? Where does he work? Crayolla?


I give up. A comment on a comment about commenting does not constitute a comment. You are unsufferable. Someone, please pull the plug on her life support and do all of us a favor.


Winner! Two Best Years and counting. And stop dangling your participles, please.


Who are you?

And finally, Dear Blog:

Stop complaining. I think your background sucks too, but what's a guy to do? I'll try to get the password and do some interior decorating, but its a long shot. I hear she keeps it locked up in her gun vault with a safety on the last three digits. And those lazer motion sensor devices are all around the fridge. There's no way we're gonna be able to move all the deserts outta the way and crack the code on the safe between lazer sweeps. Why would anyone keep their piston in the fridge? Stay low. Don't blush. We'll think of something. Ewe. Green and brown swirly cues. I feel for ya brother. I'll kick some tires for old time sake. Maybe spit over the fence. Kick back and watch a game with my feet on the cocktail table. You know. Just so you can remember what is was like to do straight black lines and a few muted colors, no pastels, no girly man templates.

Hang in there.

Sandra said...

In the paragraph about negotiating the sale of 12 acres, change the spelling of merchnat czar to merchant czar and add a question mark, then we'll talk.

Swirly cues? Really?

Noelle said...

And Dave, go write a book and quit picking on my blog.

PS. I totally understood the 12 kids and 6 months comment...that's all that matters.

Manda said...

I totally understand the 12 kids and 6 months comment as least I understand what I take from it, and what I take is totally wanted to throw that in there.
I'm ready to quit today though! Or at least multiply myself by 4...hmm...

Mr. Thompson and Me said...

I still want to be Woolley's EFF.

Friend - no worries. we'll cathc up to each other...eventually. You might just see me roaming the rose section this Saturday.

Love you girl! (hang in there)

Anonymous said...

Who am I? I am CAMAREE! The name should say it all.

Actually, I am (for the most part)a silent blog stalker. But I truly find all of you . . . very entertaining.

Thanks for asking, Mr. Woolley!

Amy said...

Woolley -

Usually when you say "winner" you give somebody a prize. So...what do I get? Something cool I hope. Cooler than a lecture about dangling my participles.

Brother-in-law works at that Jr. High you've heard of because you taught at Lone Peak. Also, Crayola sucks and has nothing to do with "real art" at least that's what I think art snobs think. What do I know?

David G. Woolley said...

So Camaree:

Are you Japanese? Was your Mother's Maiden name Corolla? I think I know your brother, Tacoma. He was a real Prius, but don't tell him I said that. I think I took your sister, Sienna, on a date once, but we broke it off when she told me her style was more Land Cruiser than family van. Some people always think the lease agreement is greener on the other side of the hill. Hope she grows up before the loan default comes due.


PS: Any chance you know a guy named Yaris? We went to school together. Just wondering.