Monday, May 11, 2009

This Is Not A Test


Fellow Because Nice Matterers:

This is Dave Woolley, staff blogger for Monday Mid Day news.


I interrupt the regularly scheduled Noelle to advise you of an Amber to Medium Yellow Alert.


No need get your home land security blood pressure boiling. Yet.


We're fairly certain Noelle is still alive, but the stress of humans showing up at the nursery is a frightful bit too much for her after a winter of total sprouting isolation.


I know you're all freaking at her recent sporadic posting schedule. Me too. I called 911.


When they got to the nursery they radioed back that she was going to put something up today.


The medic obviously doesn't know her like we do. She's not entirely out of her retail mind, but initial reports indicate she's volatile and armed. I warned them not to approve her gun license.


The attending medic called it mid-season traumatic nursery syndrome.


You know it as Spring Fever.


The good news?


She's coherent, upright and her barometric pressure is forecasting no change in the weather or her dizzy spells.


The bad news?


She's gone back into the arboretum.


With fewer than four sightings on Monday, we may never get her to a computer.


Stay tuned.


We'll post sighting updates along with our daily Sasquatch reports right here.


If the warning level goes above orange on our way to the unthinkable Red Home Land Nursery Warning Level, start fasting and praying.

Come out of the woods Noelle. Please.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

You guys are too much. I am going to have to visit all of you again sometime, in the fall.

Amy said...

Dude (Woolley), I hope when you hacked in that you invited yourself to be an author on her blog - although I kindof doubt it's really you, mostly because the background is still DANG cute, and something tells me if you were the boss....it wouldn't be.

Dear Noelle, I miss you. Please come back.

David G. Woolley said...

Amy:

I can do cute. But when in Rome you blog background as the Romans. And to avoid any direct contact with the swirly cues, I sent the guest blog by FedEx with a warning for the deliver guy to drop it at the nursery door and run. I hope he's okay.

Sandra said...

Ok everyone, I am on my way to pick up an order and have to drive past the nursery to get there. I will stop in and make sure Noelle is fine.

Sandra said...

I just got back from the nursery. Busy place today. I saw Noelle- alive and in person. She is fine. She still speaks in coherent, intelligent sentences and even answered my tree questions and my son's questions.

Now Mr. Woolley, would you please let her get some work done?