My mom has a ginormous vacuum.
I think someone custom built it for her.
Here...I'll show you.
It's so big I had to take two pictures.
Don't mind the dust on my pots.
I'm working on it.
Yesterday I asked if I could borrow the vacuum.
My dad about had a fit.
"It's a bad idea."
"It's going to get broken."
It didn't get broken because we threatened the lives of the employees who brought it to me.
They loaded it in the back of our 6-wheeler and drove it slowly to my office.
I turned it on and was disappointed.
Somehow I thought it should be making more noise than it was.
With the amount of dirt on my floor, I expected something louder.
However, the floor looked cleaner so I persisted.
I vacuumed off and on the entire day.
Turns out vacuuming causes contractions and I had to take it easy.
At some point during the day my sister came into my office.
She saw what I was doing and said to her 8 year old daughter, "Erika, can you vacuum the floor please?"
This is Erika.
She said, "Sure Mommy. Do I put it on 2?"
My sister said yes, Erika turned the vacuum on and...
There was noise...lots and lots of noise...just as there should have been.
"Erika? What did you put on 2?" I wondered.
She showed me, I tried it, and what do you know...
Three hours later and I finally figured out how to use the vacuum.
It's a hard world to live in for us old people.
And for your enjoyment...
I walked into the kitchen in my office and found this:
She was just hanging out in the cupboard.
I wonder if I could fit in there...
It looks like the perfect hiding place.