Tuesday, March 6, 2012

The New Normal

Morning sickness.
Not me.

This is Jason's explanation for the reason our little lady is still throwing up.
We had 12 days without it, and we were hopeful that Emily had grown out of a phase.
It was not to be.

For a week her schedule was every day.
Right now she's on track for every other day.
We plan our lives around her schedule.
When she throws up right when we take her out of bed we know that she will probably really throw up at some point during her next feed.

This morning she has a doctors appointment during the middle of her feed.
Call me crazy, but I don't want Emily throwing up while the doctor is trying to measure her head for a helmet.  (Last time she threw up she cried and her entire little body shook for 20 minutes.  It's not pretty.)
I'm going to change her schedule and feed her early, getting the throwing up out of the way, and then she should be good the rest of the day.

Sunday night I told my dad that my prayers in this regard were not being answered,
If they were she would not throw up.

Don't say it.  I know.  Kids throw up.  And if that's all it was I would be okay with it.
But the experience traumatizes my baby every single time.
I'm not okay with that.

My dad suggested that perhaps I needed to change what I ask for.
And so sometime this morning, between two and three when I couldn't sleep because of a migraine that is lasting way too long, I prayed and said, "If she's going to throw up, would you please, at the very least, help her to not be traumatized?"
We'll see what happens.

How is it that I can write an entire post about throw up and you're still reading?
Are you?
Still reading?

I hadn't planned on this post.
I thought of a story I wanted to tell you ... a really good story, and I had the post written in my mind.
I was excited to sit down at my laptop and write it out.
But then I was hit with the migraine from you know where, and that story is gone.
I can't remember even a little bit of what I was going to write about.

Here's something.
Yesterday I took three of my nieces to the store with me.
I told them that if they didn't ask for anything I would buy them a treat when we got to the check out counter.
32 seconds into the shopping trip we passed the St. Patrick Day display and it was downhill from there.

"But Noelle, I don't have anything green."
"I need this for school.  You don't want me to get pinched do you?"
And on it went.

"Shoes!  Noelle, I need new shoes."
"Isn't this dress beautiful?  I really need a new dress."
"Can I have this and a treat?"

At one point I caved and told them that they could choose between a treat or a St. Patrick's Day headband.
My niece Gabi who is 7 carried two headbands everywhere we went debating on which one she wanted more.

"Noelle, I can't decide.  Can I have both?"
I said to her, "You really want two headbands?"
She didn't say anything for a few minutes and then asked, "So, when you said 'you really want two headbands' does that mean you are going to buy both of them for me?"

Here's how it ended up.

Gabi got two headbands.
Sami got a green shirt.
Erika got one headband and two candy bars.

I'm weak.  And now really behind schedule.  Have a great day!


Mom on a Line said...

Oh, Noelle. I know your pain. I hate vomit! I hate seeing my baby vomit! I hate that there are no answers! And I hate having to plan the day around vomit!

Yes, we did it too. For us, we knew if DQ was going to be in the car, we'd need to be prepared to stop and catch it. We knew if we fed her, she'd vomit. One of the reasons for us pulling the NG was because it was overfeeding Izzy and she was vomiting the excess. The cardio really wanted her to gain weight, but she couldn't because once she started vomiting, she wouldn't stop. Her belly just couldn't take that much. Cutting down on the milk helped. Not putting her in a car. Making sure she sat a particular way. There were so many rules that we had.

I feel for you. I hope they find an answer quickly for all of your sake. Sweet Emily doesn't deserve to be traumatized by her little body.

Sending so many hugs your way.

Jen said...

Boo to throw up. I was really hoping that adding that extra reflux medicine was the answer. Hopefully this "mystery" will pass soon.

Poor baby. I'm tramatized when I throw up too...I usually cry...

Elleny said...

That picture is too precious and I am so mad about the throwing up again. Ughhh can't you just have some good luck stick around for a while?

Thomas & Alicia Montgomery said...

I'm still reading it because I'm totally use to the vomit now from my tubie! And she is use to it too! kinda sad when she doesn't even cry anymore after she throws up. (she's 19M old and has been vomiting since she got an ngtube at 5M old). Anyway, your not alone in that part of feeding tubes! I also revolve everything around my daughters feeding/ throw up schedule! I feed her at 8am, she vomits, at 9am and then we head off to therapy. and I can never feed her right before an appt because she is always scared, then cries and will throw up!
I really hope things change for us! oh and they have been telling me she will "grow out" of the vomit stage since forever!

Of One Heart said...

I'm still reading. I always will.

Em is taller than her soft toy!

You're a good-heart Mum.

I'm praying for Em's gut.